<The Most Important Qualities of Entrepreneur>
The world of business is like a jungle. This is the world where the strong prey upon the weak and the world full of changes and challenges. Since even a small decision possibly changes whole path where a company should goes through, the role of entrepreneur becomes more and more important as company grows up. Numerous qualities are required to entrepreneur, but especially leadership, challenging spirit and Insight on market are the most significant abilities to manage a company.
First, Leadership is the most essential key factor to be a successful entrepreneur. A good leader can guide a company toward the road of prosperity, but a company without proper leadership is like a dismasted vessel that can easily shrink. At the same time, being an entrepreneur means being a decision-maker in every occasion, as well as being responsible for any result that might happen. To succeed in a business, entrepreneur should be able to efficiently manage his or her organization, carefully listen to others and make a bold decision.
Second, challenging spirit is the next significant thing for entrepreneurs. Based on strong leadership, a leader of company should be very risk-taking, because new opportunities to grow up in business field are usually subtle, not obviously proven and sometimes seems dangerous. For example, in IT and electronics industries, entrepreneur's decision to whether introduce new technology or not to their product can enormously effect to their long-term benefit. Even if the technology is not proven popular or needed, an entrepreneur needs to take challenge so that he or she would able to lead the market.
Lastly, market insight is also one of the most crucial factors of good entrepreneur. Entrepreneurs have to see changed on trend and complex taste of customers, because even slight missing in their business can drive huge loss in their market. For instance, in fashion market, detecting new fashion trends and promptly reflecting it to goods is absolutely the most important thing to succeed. Therefore, a good entrepreneur means a person who is able to see what is unseen to others, quickly catch what people need, and lead organization with confidence. Insight came from a wide range of experience and analysis, so entrepreneur should continuously train himself to gain it.
As a good entrepreneur, leadership, challenging spirit and market insight are essential. However, these do not mean everything as an entrepreneur, and there are other numerous crucial qualities to be successful. Thus, only adventurous and competent person based on these qualities can survive and succeed. However, this is the point what the world of businessperson fascinates us at the same time. No moderateness is acceptable to be a successful entrepreneur. However, once you succeed, this world will bring about unimaginable success and fame to you.
To: Hyein Jin From: Jisu Song 201001709 Assignment : Classification Essay
ReplyDelete1. What I like about this piece of writing is your hook. You used a metaphor to visualize how fierce business environment is.
2. Your main point seems to be introducing important abilities to be a successful entrepreneur.
3. These particular words or lines struck me as powerful:
Words or lines I like them because
‘Thus, only adventurous and competent person based on these qualities can survive and succeed.’
I liked this sentence from the conclusion because this clearly shows your topic in one sentence.
4. Some things aren’t clear to me. These lines or parts could be improved (meaning not clear, supporting points missing, order seems mixed up, writing not lively):
Lines or parts Need improving because
However, these do not mean everything as an entrepreneur, and there are other numerous crucial qualities to be successful. Thus, only adventurous and competent person based on these qualities can survive and succeed.
This part is from your conclusion. I don’t really see why you had to use ‘Thus’. I don’t see that kind of connection.
5. The one change you could make that would make the biggest improvement in this piece of writing is typo. You shouldn’t have capitalized some words. And in the 2nd sentence of your 3rd body paragraph, I think ‘changed’ should be ‘changes’.
1. What I like about this piece of writing is that you have the clear thesis sentence and the topic sentences in each paragraph. And the diverse use of words which enhance the quality of your writing.
ReplyDelete2. Your main point seems to be this: In order to be a successful businessman you should have leadership, challenging sprit and insight on market.
3. These particular words or lines struck me as powerful:
Words or lines I like them because
- This is the world where the stron prey upon the weak and the world full of changes and challenges. : A very nice hook! Also, it really starts well your writing.
- a bold decision : a word, 'bold' freauently used with a noun 'decision'. It reminds me of it.
-because new opportunities to grow up in business field are usually subtle, not obviously proven and sometimes seems dangerous. : You describe the rewason why a entrapreneur should be risk-taking. You made the sentence very fancy and clear by making use of proper adjectives.(subtle, proven)
-but a company without proper leadership is like a dismasted vessel that can easily shrink.: I hope someday I could use some expressions and metaphores like this one...
4. Some things aren’t clear to me. These lines or parts could be improved (meaning not clear, supporting points missing, order seems mixed up, writing not lively):
I actually understand everything in your writing with no problems. I just carefully recommand you to change this 'so entrepreneur should continuously train himself to gain it.' to 'so entrepreneur should continue to train himself to gain it.' It is nothing I know.. I just tried really hard to write something here..
5. The one change you could make that would make the biggest improvement in this piece of writing is the last part. You use 'However' twice in your last three sentences. I know what you are saying, but I think there need some reorganizing.
Second Draft
ReplyDeleteThe world of business is like a jungle. This is the world where the strong prey upon the weak and the world full of changes and challenges. Since even a small decision possibly changes whole path where a company should goes through, the role of entrepreneur becomes more and more important as company grows up. Numerous qualities are required to entrepreneur, but especially leadership, challenging spirit and Insight on market are the most significant abilities to manage a company.
First, Leadership is the most essential key factor to be a successful entrepreneur. A good leader can guide a company toward the road of prosperity, but a company without proper leadership is like a dismasted vessel that can easily shrink. At the same time, being an entrepreneur means being a decision-maker in every occasion, as well as being responsible for any result that might happen. To succeed in a business, entrepreneur should be able to efficiently manage his or her organization, carefully listen to others and make a bold decision.
Second, challenging spirit is the next significant thing for entrepreneurs. Based on strong leadership, a leader of company should be very risk-taking, because new opportunities to grow up in business field are usually subtle, not obviously proven and sometimes seems dangerous. For example, in IT and electronics industries, entrepreneur's decision to whether introduce new technology or not to their product can enormously effect to their long-term benefit. Even if the technology is not proven popular or needed, an entrepreneur needs to take challenge so that he or she would able to lead the market.
Lastly, market insight is also one of the most crucial factors of good entrepreneur. Entrepreneurs have to see changes on trend and complex taste of customers, because even slight missing in their business can drive huge loss in their market. For instance, in fashion market, detecting new fashion trends and promptly reflecting it to goods is absolutely the most important thing to succeed. Therefore, a good entrepreneur means a person who is able to see what is unseen to others, quickly catch what people need, and lead organization with confidence. Insight came from a wide range of experience and analysis, so entrepreneur should continuously train himself to gain it.
As a good entrepreneur, leadership, challenging spirit and market insight are essential. However, these do not mean everything as an entrepreneur, and there are other numerous crucial qualities to be successful. Only adventurous and competent person based on these qualities can survive and succeed. However, this is the point what the world of businessperson fascinates us at the same time. No moderateness is acceptable to be a successful entrepreneur. However, once you succeed, this world will bring about unimaginable success and fame to you.